My book is called, The High Road Has Less Traffic: honest advice on the path through love and divorce. Divorce is an epidemic in our nation. I love to read and when I found myself staring down the face of divorce a few years ago, I tried to find a book that would help me understand, deal with, and survive my situation. I could never quite find the book I was seeking. I wanted that “girlfriend” – the one who was going to be honest and blunt, faithful and funny, sarcastic and heart-felt. I decided to write this book to share my story, provide some hope and inspiration, and be that empathetic girlfriend. My goal is that this book serves this purpose and provides valuable wisdom, hugs, humor and inspiration that get you through divorce. The high road truly does have less traffic!
Tell us something about yourself.
Here’s a little about me … I live in suburban Atlanta with my husband, Justin, and my two children. Free time is devoted to family activities like cheering for my kids at their sporting events, golfing, boating, traveling, taking photographs, reading, and volunteering in the community. I am also the Founder and President of ISHR Group which provides global solutions in the area of leadership assessment, development and coaching. I hold a Bachelors Degree from the University of Michigan, a Masters Degree from Michigan State University, and a Juris Doctorate from Albany Law School. I love to write and frequently contribute to business periodicals on the subject of leadership and coaching. I don’t do anything crazy like jump out of airplanes! I have a strong faith and really felt a need to write this book!
What inspired you to write this book?
Divorce is a reality. Not a week goes by that someone doesn’t call me asking for advice about some phase of the divorce journey. Some women are still in shock over discovering infidelity. Others are angry that their ‘happily ever after’ isn’t happening. Some women are paralyzed by the insurmountable road ahead of them as they navigate the legal process. Others ask if I can teach them how to forgive. I have been through this process and learned a tremendous amount. My mission is to influence women to take the high road in navigating the divorce process.
How did you choose the title?
I was sitting at a Human Resources/Talent Management conference, and I hate to admit it, but I started daydreaming and the title came to me! My apologies to the speaker for checking out!! I already had started writing the book, but I didn’t have the perfect title yet! I love the imagery that the title conveys!
What obstacles did you encounter in getting this book published? How did you overcome them?
In terms of writing the book, I wanted to be sure that my book was truly reflective of taking the high road and I worked diligently to ensure that I wasn’t veering off track. In terms of publishing the book, I was amazed at how many times I could read the book (or have others read the book!) and yet we would continue to find typos and errors. It just goes to show you can never, ever proof a book enough!
How did you know you wanted to be a writer? How did you get started?
I have always loved to write and it comes naturally to me. And, while I have written poems, and articles, I had never written a book before. I work in leadership assessment, development and coaching for my “day job” and I always assumed my first book, written with my two business partners, would be about leadership. As it turns out, I felt a calling to write a book about my experience with my divorce. I literally started writing chapter outlines while I was out of town on business one night … and stayed up for hours. I ended up outlining nearly 20 chapters in one sitting and knew this was something I had to finish! Our book on leadership and coaching will still follow because I’ve learned so much from this experience!
Do you have any writing rituals?
None! I wrote whenever I could find the time. What worked best for me was finding absolutely quiet, alone time … which most often occurred late at night. There were many nights with very few hours of sleep as this came together.
Did you learn anything from writing and publishing this book? What?
I learned so much. I truly believe that everyone has a story inside of them waiting to be told. And, I truly believe that telling that story is an integral part of your own personal development. Not only did I learn a tremendous amount about the process and art of writing and publishing a book, but also a tremendous amount about me.
If you were doing it all over again, what would you do differently?
I don’t think I would do anything differently! I would know to be more patient with the entire process though! It’s a slow process to get it edited, proofed and sent to be published!
What types of books do you like to read? Who are your favorite authors?
I love to read all kinds of books. The problem is that I get “lost” in books and once I get sucked in, everything else takes second place. The kids don’t eat, the laundry doesn’t get done, I don’t go to work … OK, that’s an exaggeration, but once I get engrossed in a book, which usually doesn’t take long, I have to finish the book pretty quickly. I would much rather read a book than watch TV or go to a movie.
Are you working on your next book? What can you tell us about it?
I have two books percolating in my mind. As I’ve already said, one of them will be a book written with my two business partners on the work we are doing in leadership assessment and coaching. I also have plans to continue the “high road” series with another book written with my husband.
What is the best advice you could give other writers about writing or publishing?
I would ask, “What’s stopping you?” As I said earlier, everyone has a book inside of them waiting to be written, and too many people don’t pursue telling their story. I would encourage them to just give it a try … sit down and see what words come pouring out of you, and give it an honest effort before giving up!
Who is the perfect reader for your book?
The perfect reader for my book will be a woman between the ages of roughly 25-65 who wants to be in a relationship, is in a relationship, or is in the process of ending a relationship. While the book serves as a guide for divorce, I have also received a tremendous amount of feedback from married women that this book serves as a very good reminder of the need to ensure that respect and communication are foundational in any relationship.
Where can readers learn more about you and your book?
I’ve created a Facebook application around the book called the SoleMates Quiz. I’ve partnered with Onlineshoes.com (the oldest online shoe e-tailer!) to offer a 15% discount (until October 7, 2010) to anyone who completes the Facebook app. After all, who doesn’t like to save 15% on shoes!